Rose Brabant

One of the hardest and final parts of doing my major purging is confronting my old photographs. I’ve been lugging around so much stuff for years. Why, in fact, did I insist on holding on? My inner voice says, “Look at your garbage before you throw it away, literally and figuratively.”

Your past doesn’t define who you are. I repeat: your past doesn’t define who you are today. It’s a component, a stepping stone but not the final result. We hang on to all of these physical, exterior things because in a sense, we are clinging to our identity. Who you are, is not what you own or what you did. You can own nothing, but the people who know you will truly know you no matter what you possess. They know what makes you tick, what you adore and all the little habits that make you uniquely you. They know your heart.

I can comfortably say I graduated from the school of hard knocks. I look through pictures of my childhood and young adulthood wondering how I survived certain things: trauma, physical and emotional abuse, toxic relationships, bad choices & risks. I count my blessings that I was never completely poverty stricken or deathly ill, but I’m just now getting over the repercussions at 32 years of age. It can take a long damn time to exorcise the weight that holds you down. I used to wake up in terror from nightmares of events that happened 20 years ago. Bless all the years of journaling, self-help books, friends, mentors, meditation, crying, yoga, the love of my children and my partner who has loved me enough to help me unpack all of my baggage. Fortunate are those who have someone who will love you enough to listen and help you sift through all of your shit so you can start over again. If you can make amends with your mistakes and forgive the mistakes of others, you are on that path to liberation.

Me at my 5th birthday party

My final decision is to keep a few key photographs from long ago that remind me of the good within the bad. I’m not keeping all of them. I’m not going to stay stuck and hold this weight any more. Even if it feels a little difficult, it’s for the best. Don’t be fooled by the comfort of having a tragic story, that’s not who you are NOW. My choice is to move on and say goodbye.

Stay tuned, my next post will explore the benefits of choosing a minimalist lifestyle…

Nothing puts you in a more vulnerable position then bearing your soul to someone else. When you take that step to live with someone, you get to know their every habit and quirk possible. Secrets are harder to sustain. You still have secrets. But some of them may slip out or eventually be discovered unintentionally.

True intimacy is not just about sex and romance. Intimacy is getting to the core and seeing the truth of the person before your eyes. Sometimes other people have this habit of pointing out things we don’t want to see in our selves. Somehow they become the “bad guy” but really they are just holding up the mirror. Relationship is opportunity for self-awareness. It has the potential to help us fix what was broken and to grow into becoming our best selves. It’s not easy, but the benefits are enormous.

With time invested into a relationship, the issue of commitment arises too. When someone doesn’t fully commit to you 100%, it has the potential to be a breeding ground for insecurities. With the lack of commitment, the seed of doubt is planted and issues of self-worth can arise. Even if their lack of being able to commit has absolutely nothing to do with you and has to do with their own issues, it still raises some cause for concern. It’s not okay to equate self-worth with how someone else feels about us. More work needs to be done, more looking within.

But in order to find the greatest and deepest love, there has to be a willingness to be honest and revealing. You have to be okay with putting in the effort and with being fragile from time to time. The love you receive and give is in direct proportion to the depth and the height of how open you allow yourself to be. It’s an act of surrender. It means surrendering to the fact that some days, you will indeed be wrong. Some days, you will have to apologize. Some days, you will have to shelve yourself to elevate your beloved. Some days, you will have to be at your worst and be okay with someone else seeing that. Every day, stay close to the source, stay close to love. This is where you can say yes to happiness. If you lie or doubt or constantly seek control, you cut yourself off from the source.

To show up every day in a relationship and do the best you can is an act of bravery. To constantly reveal yourself, to share your body, your thoughts, your time with someone is truly a sacred act. If you value yourself and your time, then you should be with someone who equally does or even more.

Was January the most amazing month for you? Did you learn anything new? I think we all come out of the gate thrashing at the beginning of the year with big hopes and dreams like:  I’m going to get six pack abs, start a company, travel to Europe, eat healthy every single day, be more social, volunteer, etc, etc. Then before you know it, the inevitable crash and burn comes in because we’ve overloaded our plate and the balance of life has been thrown off. By mid-February, 80% of American’s resolutions are abandoned and there is a degree of guilt that goes with that. Abandon guilt and adopt pacing. Houses are built one brick at a time.

For the past 3 months, I’ve been battling sickness. I have honestly maybe felt like my normal self for about 4 solid days. I have a chronic bronchitis/flu that has been rendering me incapable of my normal super woman feats. Sickness has roots in the emotional self and stress plants really nasty seeds that take a long time to uproot. I’ve been plugging along every day, working full time, trying to go to the gym even though I barely have energy. Then I have days like today, where I just can’t move. I was leveled out to zero.

But I can tell you that there is something valuable and beautiful in feeling like total hell and not being at 100%. First, you realize what you take for granted, like being able to breathe normally every day. Second, the simple things become heaven like enjoying a steamy bowl of soup, snuggling in bed with my favorite blanket and actually getting to sit still for a moment. The simple things like laughing and reading to my children, going for a walk on a gorgeous day, getting up a little earlier to slowly enjoy a cup of coffee, talking to a friend that I haven’t connected with in a while… these are such little things but they are so grand. So maybe I didn’t accomplish “tasks” this month but on another level, I gained so much more. I’m learning to slow down a little, love a whole lot deeper than I ever have and savor the small gifts that life gives every day. If we forget simplicity, life will make sure we are jolted into remembering.

Let’s face it, moving on is sometimes the hardest thing to do. We might even cling to pain because it becomes so familiar, letting go means that we have to journey into uncharted territory and by default we are habitual creatures. With the year almost up, it’s expected to become sentimental and reflect on the past year. Right now is the time to take inventory. What’s working? What needs to go? Surely this year has brought you many blessings, some in disguise.

Anger can arise from focusing on what wasn’t accomplished. I have a tendency to do that and behind that tendency is a form of greed which can never be healthy. It means that you did not get “enough”. Well the good news is, tomorrow is another day. I am certain that every single one of you has grown in some shape or form in the past year. For me, 2011 was about getting down to what my true priorities in life are and getting down to zero in order to lay a new foundation. Especially financially, this year has not been the best and I know there are so many who know exactly what I’m talking about.

So I suggest you take the time to write 3 lists. List One will be to write down all of the blessings that 2011 has brought to you, that you would like to bring into 2012. List Two is what you’re needing to get rid of. After you’re done writing this one, the fun part is to burn it! List Three is the manifesting list. I’m personally going to take this one step further and do a vision board over a few glasses of champagne on New Year’s Eve.

A key piece here is to make sure you are completely over anything that might be holding you back from getting what you want. For example, if you want a new romantic relationship and you’re still pining over your ex, chances are that your baggage will create problems either now or later. I suggest that you kill the thoughtforms that keep you chained to the past first. A great way to do that would be to write a letter to your ex or whomever or whatever emotion you can’t let go of. It could apply to anyone, let’s say you’ve had some long term drama with a friend. Get everything out on paper: the good, the bad, the ugly. Say goodbye and burn it. Do this as many times as you need to until the thoughtform is gone so you can have peace.

If you didn’t have the greatest year but you’re still currently breathing and standing, you have another shot! On the contrary, if you conquered the world in 2011, maybe this upcoming year will be more about relaxing and enjoying the fruits of your labor. Let’s welcome in 2012 with a bang! I wish all of you an amazing, prosperous and healthy New Year!

With the holidays upon us, many people feel stumped on what gifts to get. Why not this year, not just focus on the gifts but the real gifts like quality time? Create meaning! Here are some ideas:

Ideas for your Partner

• Cook them their favorite meal as a surprise

• Give them a massage

• Plan a night of quiet time at home with no distractions to pay full attention to each other

Ideas for your Friends

• Send them an actual handwritten letter to let them know you’re thinking about them

• Make time to meet up for coffee and catch up

• Frame their favorite poem or quote
• Offer to babysit or run an errand for them if they are short on time
  

Ideas for your Family

• Put together a photo album of the previous year of your favorite family photos together

• Plan a movie night so the family can sit together & watch a movie; bring snacks
• Get a craft project you can all work on together like a puzzle or get a new board game

Ideas for your Community

• Sign up for Big Brothers Big Sisters or volunteer at Boys & Girls Club

• Help support recycling

• Purchase from your local farmers market & local businesses as opposed to Walmart

“If you wish to experience peace, provide peace for another.”- Dalai Lama

Best Wishes,

Rose

I think it’s time to really pour my heart out because maybe it will do some good…

I’ve gotten into the habit of reading the news every morning. I took a break for awhile from it because I’m an “empath”. Translation: I’m ridiculously sensitive. I couldn’t help but to return back to it. Is ignorance truly bliss? I think that most evil things stem from some form of ignorance so I’d rather be aware. As I look through the news every day I almost wind up in tears. I saw a photo today of a starving child in Somalia. His body was completely emaciated and he had the skin of an old man. I could not imagine being that mother, cradling my infant as they fade away. I thought to myself…

I HAVE NO PROBLEMS.

We live in culture that is so focused on the attainment of “things” and money. We live in a society of obese, greedy people who want more and more and more. We are not taught what is “enough”. Is it really everyone’s fault? Maybe not so much. The media has had a such a huge, negative influence on people and we are finally waking up from our coma. Americans used to be considered “citizens” and now we are referred to “consumers”. Because that is what we do, we consume. We consume everything in our paths and worship money which is not even a real thing. Money is just paper and only means something because of the value we’ve placed on it. I realize that we need money to survive but to let it dominate our happiness & our being is another issue.

I understand that there are people out there who are legitimately struggling. It’s not my intention to take away from that. I’m speaking to the people who aren’t really doing that bad for themselves yet complain about how horrible their life is, because they are wrapped up in some petty drama. Time to snap out of it! It’s really not as bad as it seems…

I feel angry.

I feel angry because I feel like I haven’t contributed enough to the world just yet. I feel angry that I worry about money so much but it’s something so deeply ingrained in our culture, it’s hard to escape. But what I  can do now is make an effort every single day to be grateful and put issues in perspectives for others.

Do you know someone who has serious health problems? If you are a healthy person, do you wake up every morning and express gratitude for that? No amount of money can replace good health. It’s such a blessing. No “things” can replace the wealth of the people that truly love you. Take a moment to think of all of the amazing people you have in your life and how valuable they are. This is why I’m writing my book about relationships because relationships are THE MOST important thing our lives. Yet great emphasis is placed on so many other aspects of life and we wonder why relationships crumble.

YOU ARE SO BLESSED.

Every time you obsess over an issue, chances are it’s really small compared to the larger scheme of things. Do not wait for Thanksgiving to be thankful! Be in gratitude, right now in the moment.

Feeling a little stuck lately? Here are a few ideas to get you out of the same routine…

Let me know how these work for you!

As we close in on the remainder of the month, I wanted to tap in to the where our focus should be for the upcoming week so I pulled three cards for to see what direction to go in. I asked what the energy was “universally”. If you’re reading this blog, chances are that this will apply to you. Synchronicity in action!

I pulled three cards from the lovely Animals Divine Companion deck by Lisa Hunt to see what is in store: the Two of Swords, the Six of Wands and the Knight of Wands.

The message of this reading to take a brief respite to enjoy stillness & equilibrium. A short pause is necessary to gain composure and focus. Surrender into calmness & look at matters that are bothering you from an objective viewpoint. The next card, Six of Wands speaks of confidence. Perhaps you’ve worked really hard on something so it is okay to be proud of it. Don’t be afraid to celebrate even the smallest victories! The last card indicates that there is a strong need for creativity in our lives at this time. Creativity can be used to solve problems, to come up with new ideas and to expand on projects that have been “in the works” for awhile. Anticipate a week of fresh developments on goals you’ve been wanting to make progress on for awhile. The key is to take an entirely different approach! If you have any questions about the intuitive readings that I do, feel free to reach out to me.